Multifaceted Me Series: Married
Kyle moved to Houston the summer of 2013, and we were engaged six months later. 2014 was a whirlwind year as I began my last semester of college while planning a wedding. I graduated in May, married and moved out of my mom’s house in July, and began my first teaching job in August. It seemed we had become adults overnight!
During the summer of 2015, I registered for a three-week writing institute through my school district where we’d be expected to produce a piece of writing ready to publish in an anthology. Below is the poem I wrote about meeting the bold, kind, determined man who would become my husband.
Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop
When he shook my hand, I knew this guy was a keeper.
Strong, firm, confident.
Praises be, he was a believer.
His large hands reached out to buy my coffee,
but I wouldn’t have it because I was being snobby.
Since he had his way of forcing the barista to swipe his card,
I huffed and puffed, marched away, and hoped this conference would not be marred.
As I chanted my mantra for the weekend “here for the ministry, not for a man,”
he boomingly interrupted my thoughts to let me know that would never happen again.
I raised my eyebrows wanting to give him a piece of my mind,
but the assured and kind look on his face instead made me unwind.
Five years later, the poem sounds as corny as could possibly be. But here I am, thankful as ever that this man insisted on buying my coffee. Kyle and I consistently received criticism that we were too young for marriage: we’d lived in the same city for only six months, we were broke, we had not started our careers.
One argument Kyle and I believed to be most amusing was: “How could you get married so young and expect to be married to the same person…your entire…life?!” The same person? Over the course of our eight years of knowing each other, including six years of marriage, we have both been (and been married to) a multitude of different people. To believe that we remain the same our entire lives is ludicrous. Growing and changing alongside another human being is mentally and emotionally laborious.
It is also rewarding and satisfying to have such an intimate closeness to someone’s transformation. As lifelong learners who love discussion and reading and critical thinking, a front row seat to each other’s evolving humanity is the sweetest place we could be.